Comedy Blue Balls.
Recently I noticed something about myself. When I go just to watch comedy shows or open mics, it drives me crazy. I want a turn on stage but I don’t get one. I can barely sit still, I will just get up and start walking around — I cannot sit still. I usually go to the bathroom and just wash my hands to throw off suspicion. I need an outlet for my antsy feeling. I call this sensation comedy blue balls, because watching a show just gets me all horned up wanting to perform. At first I tossed this aside as super frustrating, but later I realized it can be a great way to motivate myself.
Comedy Blue Balls
Dictionary.com defines Blue balls as: “a slang term to refer to a mildly painful feeling in the testicles of unrelieved sexual arousal. It can also refer to “sexual frustration” in general.
I find the continued practice of standup comedy to be very challenging. Much like the pursuit of mastery in anything there will be long periods of time feeling I am not progressing. So I look for creative ways of motivating myself to keep at it. One of the ways I do this is with comedy blue balls. I go and watch shows that are at or just above my level. This tends to spark my completive fire and gives me energy to work harder at my craft. The best place for me to be is when I cannot even sit down to enjoy a show. The shows that I am able to unleash this energy I’ve built up watching and waiting for my turn are some of my greatest performances. Everything is a transfer of energy. Going and supporting shows I want to be on is important in other ways too.
What got me here, may not get me there.
When I feel that I am losing steam or getting bored I like to look at what I have done to get here. Are there things I have not tried yet? What is working for me? This is a great way to get myself out of a rut. I found it very interesting when I looked at what I am doing that is producing the most results. Take my comedy writing process. I have always tried to follow the advice about writing. Write every day, organize, and cut words out. Just keep editing it down more and more. This worked for me at first, to write out exactly what I am going to say, memorize it, take it to the stage, then go back and edit it. But recently I realized that the last few jokes that I’ve been most proud of were not written with this process. For some reason I keep doing this process but it really hasn’t worked in a while. I realized that at first, yes, this is very helpful, but eventually one's process must evolve. I think about the Albert Einstein quote: “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” So allowing my writing process to evolve and grow as I evolve and grow as a comedian has become very important to me. I’ve known that memorizing a script gives me anxiety and takes me out of the present moment, so why did I keep trying to do that!
Journaling.
Writing things down has helped me get excited about comedy. It’s a silly thing but I will take motivation wherever I can get it. By writing down and organizing my thoughts it tends to get me very excited about the processes of standup. It is this writing down of ideas that ultimately lead me to begin writing this blog. When I observe something or help a friend with something, writing it down will get me so excited about comedy again.
Take a break.
So much of the advice I hear is about just going as hard as you can, but sometimes taking a step back can be so helpful. This one is dangerous for me as I have taken a break that turned into a year long break. So now I keep outside obligations like running my own shows to keep me on the path, but I do allow myself to take breaks from time to time. It's not just performance breaks, it’s even thinking breaks. I work to not think about comedy for a few days. Go do non-comedy activities. “Live a life worth commenting on.” (I’ve heard several comedians say that so I have no idea who it is quoting and Google didn’t either). These breaks are important to bring in new ideas and find new thinking. I trust I will always come back to standup eventually, the reason I do standup is because I have to, it’s a compulsion, a healthy addiction, and I love it.
Take a walk.
Often for me the simple act of going for a walk is exactly what I need. There are ways I will add a walk to my life that isn’t just going for a walk. I have the advantage of a dog who loves and requires at least two of these a day. But I will find ways of adding walks like if I am heading to a show maybe I take the bus instead of driving. This is a great way to relax and let someone else drive while I can use my mind for one task. I have also recently stopped listening to things on my walks or commute. Just be present. It is amazing how many great ideas I will have when I just get bored, even for a few minutes. I feel like I have this competitive advantage when I look around and everyone is looking at their phones or listening to headphones and I am not. But very quickly I will have a great idea for a joke and pull out the phone to write it down, bringing me down to reality that I am just as human as everyone else.
“In order to master a field, you must love the subject and feel a profound connection to it. Your interest must transcend the field itself and border on the religious.” -Robert Greene
The hardest part of standup comedy can be staying on the path when it’s not working. I keep doing it because I love it and I do it to feel alive. Sometimes I have to take a step back before I can take 2 steps forward. Right now shelter in place is preventing us all from standup comedy and has been really challenging. Many comedians are getting some serious comedy blue balls, but we will all get and come out of it stronger. If you liked this article subscribe to my email list below and please share it with someone who would appreciate it.
Thank you for reading, You’re doing great.
Bjorn RG.